Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Yes, this has been long overdue. And Guru and I are totally FED up of people asking us these questions again and again, also mostly because they forget the answers. Anyway, here is a quick reference for all those facts that are important for you to live your life.
THE GREAT LIST OF FAQs, Volume 1

You are here. "DON'T PANIC"
Q. Where can I find life-changing, thought-provoking stuff to read on the internet?
A. http://fillosoficaly-urs.blogspot.com/

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. It wanted to be in the tandoor, with other chicken.

Q. How much is 1+1?
A. 2

Q. Why is this blog on a different account, and not made the usual way, with both of us being team members v1.0?
A. Guru made the blog. And this method works.

Q. Who is the Diva?
A. Uncle. (diva-walk=uncle walk, diva-speak=uncle speak, etc)

Q. Why do you put such stuff up?
A. Because we can.

Q. Did Guru ever set his hair on fire?
A. Yes.

Q. Why is this blog on a different account, and not made the usual way, with both of us being team members v1.1?
A. Because we did not want people to know who we are.

Q. Why did the bystander mention fashion industry when de Sa escaped a tricky situation?
A. Because Rohit Bal Bal bacha.

Q. Why did Popat shut his eyes?
A. He didn't want to hear the foul-mouthed barrage, emanating from a source nearby.

Q. Why are FAQs asked so frequently?
A. Because otherwise, they would not be Frequently Asked Questions, and as this contradicts, FAQs are asked very frequently.

Q. Which direction does the sun rise in?
A. East, for most of the world, although it rises in the North (for 6 months) and in the South (for the other 6 months) above the Arctic Circle.

Q. Why is this blog on a different account, and not made the usual way, with both of us being team members v1.2?
A. So that the anti-janitors' league does not find Guru.

Q. Did Guru ever have a sticker saying "I am (G)Guru" on his back for more than 20 minutes?
A. Yes.

Q. Did Guru ever have a sticker saying "I am (G)Guru" on his back for more than 20 minutes, and then another one saying "aka ze YO maan!" for some 5 minutes?
A. Yes.

Q. Did Guru realize he had those on for about 20 minutes before saying that one needed to be really stupid to not realize he's got stickers on his back?
A. No.

Q. What is the Popathood?
A. Collection of Parrots, and other related species (like resistors, capacitors, confused(s) and random guys.)

Q. How many people has Pranshu killed while driving?
A. Technically, none. Yet.

Q. native joke: "Do chicken daale tandoor mein, dono achchhe se pak gaye. Kaunsa gana baj raha tha background mein?"
A. Ta tananana tandoori delights tandoori delights.

Q. How many links (refer to the joke theory) does the joke above have?
A. 2.

Q. Who are the members of the soon-to-be-legendary-(after-Waves-Winters-2009)-band, !Ocean-rrr?
A. Pranshu - singer + clicker, Abhinand - laugh-artist, Uncle - bassist, Sandy - treblist, Guru - shooter + choreographer. Support staff: Gill - Officially official photographer, Juthika - Official audience.

Q. How do you pronouce the exclamation sign in the name of the band?
A. "tk". If you want a live demo, please visit Africa.

Q. Who does Nalini currently hate the most?
A. Her PS2 instructor.

Q. What is so confusing about OK?
A. If you write it as KK, it might be confused for a proper noun.

Q. What is the new proposed amendment into the joke theory?
A. Inclusion of a PD (boolean) constant (after Pralav 'Darling') that if asserted, makes a joke follow exponential distribution of the number of links.

Q. What is the difference between Abhinand and Sohini?
A. One laughs in continuous streams, the other in short bursts.

Q. What is the difference between Abhinand and Aniket?
A. 42.

Q. Who is the best original king of 'em all?
A. King Julian.

Q. How long is 12 inches?
A. 12 inches.

This long list, by no means is exhaustive. Kindly add more FAQs to help the readers.

Serving the humanity, (I mean, after all, its the jeeniuses who really do think about the welfare of the mankind.)

For Sirtifyd Jeeniuses 1 & 2,

Sirtifyd Jeenius 1.

14 comments:

KK said...

HOLY SHIT!

_/\_ _/\_

abhinand said...

why is the difference between me and aniket, 42?

and we need to make a draft of the joke theory, i do not trust the gurukul system to pass this on.

abhinand said...

btw, before it becomes an faq:

why these tags!?

sirtifyd jeeniuses said...

tags because we can :P plus the FAQs will encompass all these, once all the volumes are out.

difference between u and aniket is 42, as that is the answer to life, the universe and everything...

sirtifyd jeeniuses said...

hmm...it IS a quick reference!
guru

Vidya said...

LOL! madness!

Full Of Life said...

HAHAHAHAHA!
Naaiaiiceeee! :D

Prashant Nagpal said...

LOLest! I want mention as carrier-over (this one lasts for as many cricket balls as rajnikanth has) of the zoke theory, bhai!

Rohit said...

the random dig at me and my locks are resent-worthy.

Ojas said...

brilliant!

Chaitanya Chintaluri said...

rofl! rofl!

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